But, why is this? Would our needs not always have priority over our desire? Indeed, do they? The answer to this question not only reflects our priorities, but also our personal values. Before further discussion, it will help to define these common words so we do not misunderstand our motivations or their priority. Depending on where you seek information, you will often find the words need and desire to have similar definitions. This brings to account a common misunderstanding; while all needs may also be considered desires, not all desires can be considered needs. Therefore, it will serve us to distinguish independent definitions for these words.

Need:

• a physiological or psychological requirement for the well-being of an organism.
• a condition requiring supply or relief.

Desire:

• to long, hope or wish for. Priority: precedence, especially established by order of importance.

Values:

• beliefs or ideals shared by the members of a culture about what is good or bad and desirable or undesirable.

Considering our priorities, in Part I of this series (Motivation), Maslow's Hierarchy of Human Needs outlines that our needs have hierarchy (priority); our physiological needs have priority over our emotional or psychological needs. Therefore, our first priority should be our health and security. But, this simple statement exemplifies how easily we can become in conflict with our modern society. In order to provide for our health and security, we must depend on our career. Does that mean our career is more important than our health and security? Or, since our careers provide for the needs of our families, does that mean our families have a lower priority than our career? Does this "conflict" sound familiar? How we prioritize is a direct reflection of our values. But, are our values always reflected in the priorities we choose? Our decisions and actions may not always reflect our intentions, but they do reflect our priorities and values.
For more examples of how our values and priorities can conflict with our society, evaluate how society influences our priorities and our sense of health and security. Truly practicing health care would mean that society focuses on preventing disease. Our society provides the best crisis management system available, but practices very little health care. When our health is in crisis, we have the best care in the world; but if we are truly trying to practice health care, our system is of little use. And to evaluate the reality of our security, we are a nation living on credit – which exhibit habits that do not focus on our short- or long-term security. Society has taught us to value what we own and our social status more than our security. Most of our population has grown (or were born) completely dependent on our societal infrastructure for survival and security. We have several examples in history that this is not the best plan. We thrive only when the most of us are providers, not dependents.
I do not say all of this to concern you about solving America's challenges… only yours. You can take these or any other concerns to heart where it affects your priorities, choices and results. You just have to define the values and priorities in your life and not let society be the dominant influence on how you structure them. This takes us back to values. We have many things driving our beliefs in personal values.

The following reference to values is an excerpt from Wikipedia:
A personal value is absolute or relative and ethical value, the assumption of which can be the basis for ethical action. A value system is a set of consistent values and measures. A principle value is a foundation upon which other values and measures of integrity are based. Values which are not physiologically determined are normally considered objective, such as a desire to avoid physical pain, seek pleasure, et cetera, and are considered subjective, to vary across individuals and cultures and are in many ways aligned with belief and belief systems. Types of values include ethical/moral value, doctrinal/ideological (religious, political) values, social values, and aesthetic values. Values have typically been studied in sociology, anthropology, social psychology, moral philosophy and business ethics.
Values can be defined as broad preferences concerning appropriate courses of action or outcomes. As such, values reflect a person's sense of right and wrong or what ought to be. "Equal rights for all," "Excellence deserves admiration," and "People should be treated with respect and dignity" are representative of values.
According to Morris Massey, values are formed during three significant periods: 1) Imprint period from birth to 7 years. 2) Modeling period from 8 to 13 years. 3) Socialization period from 13 to 21 years.
Personal values provide an internal reference for what is good, beneficial, important, useful, beautiful, desirable, constructive, et cetera. Values generate behavior and help solve common human problems for survival by comparative rankings of value, the results of which provide answers to questions of why people do what they do and in what order they choose to do them (priority).
Over time the public expression of personal values, that groups of people find important in their day-to-day lives, lay the foundations of law, custom and tradition. Personal values in this way exist in relation to cultural values, either in agreement with or divergent from prevailing norms. A culture is a social system that shares a set of common values, in which such values permit social expectations and collective understandings of the good, beautiful, constructive, et cetera. Without normative personal values, there would be no cultural reference against which to measure the virtue of individual values and so culture identity would disintegrate.
That was a lot to take in. Our values are taught and influenced by society, culture, religion and our role models. Our values are formed by adulthood. Values influence behavior and attitude and serve as broad guidelines in all situations to what is good and desirable. Values provide structure to our society. And yet, because there is so much conflict with diversely competing values, our cultural identity is disintegrating.

The quotes below frame these thoughts perfectly:

"The most important thing in life, is knowing the most important things in life."
~ David F. Jakielo

"Need and desires dictate our priorities, priorities shape our choices, and choices determine our actions."
~ Dallin H. Oaks

"Your beliefs become your thoughts; Your thoughts become your words; Your words become your actions; Your actions become your habits; Your habits become your values; Your values become your destiny."
~ Mahatma Gandhi

"It's not hard to make decisions when you know what your values are."
~ Roy Disney

"Values aren't buses... They're not supposed to get you anywhere. They're supposed to define who you are."
~ Jennifer Crusie

"The Principle of Priority states (a) you must know the difference between what is urgent and what is important, and (b) you must do what's important first."
~ Steven Pressfield

"The key is not to prioritize what's on your schedule, but to schedule your priorities."
~ Stephen R. Covey

"Decide what you want, decide what you are willing to exchange for it. Establish your priorities and go to work."
~ H. L. Hunt

These pearls of wisdom provide us with clear direction; within our priorities, we determine and define what is important to us. Our priorities need to be part of our motive, our motivation and our goal (Part I and II of this series). We will have to implement priorities in our Plan, our Organizing, our Initiative, Obstacles and Navigation (Parts IV to VIII). If we want to empower ourselves, our thoughts, actions, habits and values must all reflect our priorities. It is safe to say, of all this eight part series, Priority is where the rubber meets the road and where most people get off course. Therefore, it is one of the most important parts of the process. Pardon the redundancy, (I could not stop myself) but Priorities is the priority!

Practical Application
It sounds a bit morbid at first, but if you want to find out what is important to you, write your obituary (Part II of this series on Goals). That is right – write your obituary. For anyone who finds this too troubling, write an outline for an autobiography. You will discover there is much you have not done that you still want to do. All of us have passions buried deep within us. You will realize there are fences that could be mended where pride or emotions once stood in the way. You will discover if your priorities and decisions match up with your principles and values. You will discover the things you would do different if you had the chance. Well, you do have the chance… today… and tomorrow. It is just a matter of priorities.
Sort your priorities in separate lists: things you must do; things you should do; and things you would like to do. Or, you can use the old school list of "high, medium and low" priority. Regardless how you choose, separate your priorities into lists, rank the list items in order of priority, and allocate your time and resources accordingly.

Final Thoughts:

"I do know that when I am 60, I should be attempting to achieve different personal goals than those which had priority at age 20."
~ Warren Buffett

"And then there is the most dangerous risk of all – the risk of spending your life not doing what you want on the bet you can buy yourself the freedom to do it later."
~ Randy Komisar

Next month we will discuss Planning. Remember, whether you know it or not, you have a plan! "If you fail to plan, your plan is… to fail."

William Strunk is the publisher of DERMASCOPE Magazine, founder of WES Publishing Co., founding partner with Avalon Media Group and a partner with The International Congress of Esthetics & Spa. As an entrepreneur for over 30 years, an author and lecturer, Strunk conducts motivational seminars and results oriented workshops on successful business practices. Having started his first business as a teenager, he shares successful behavioral practices that are not taught in business schools. Rather, learned from a lifetime devoted to motivational training and developing relationships with hundreds of other successful entrepreneurs.